June 9, 2008
New iPhone 3G to make millions of past models obsolete
ATTENTION IPHONE OWNERS!!!!! Steve Jobs recently announced, at the Worldwide developers conference, a revolutionary new way to make iPhones obsolete. Called the 3G iPhone, this supposed New addition to the iFamily is projected to make the over 5 million 1st generation iPhones worth significantly less than what they where originally bought for. Although the most celebrated feature in the new phone is its uncanny ability to make your current iPhone worth up to 1/4th less than sale price 36% faster than the N95 and Treo 750 , there are also many other new additions that make this product so important. The other major part of the iPhone 3G is the integrated GPS, allowing you to pinpoint those suckers that still have the 1st generation iPhone with speed and accuracy, right from your touchscreen. Also, Apple has become even more open to the addition of 3rd-party apps to the iPhone 3G, boasting an expanding application store that should be accessible from anywhere. The store is expected to grow to thousands of apps for anything, from sports score apps to apps that keep track of, say, the declining resale value of the 1st gen iPhone. The possibilities will be limitless! The real kicker of the announcement was the price range, though. Apple plans to sell the iPhone 3G for as low as $199 for the 8GB version. This low price will make the new iPhone access able to more people than ever, thereby increasing the supply-and-demand cycle that will soon make your 1st gen iPhone worth $38.75 on ebay. And since its going to be simultaneously released for the same price in 22 countries, so Americans will be even less likely to get a good price for their old iPhone, even from somebody overseas. W will all be looking forward to the release on July 11th (and try to get a job before then, that iDebt is not gonna pay itself off, you know).