Bun da da dun...da dun...da dun...Can't touch this

Now its time for:
THE FedEx DAILY STATS
-Innocent people killed in the Middle East-18
-Number of gramatical errors made by the president-46
-Total running yards-563
-Total passing yards-869
-Points scored-55
-Number of people Dick Cheney shot-4
-Number of quails Dick Cheney shot-0
-Amount of money Paris Hilton spent today-$6,674.98 plus tax
-Things on TV worth watching-1

And now... THE PRESIDENTIAL QUOTE OF THE DAY

"The only man who makes no mistake is the man who does nothing."
-Theodore Roosevelt